Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Walking Away

I came across something on Facebook last night that said:
"Give yourself permission to immediately walk away from anything that gives you bad vibes.  There is no need to explain or make sense of it.  Just trust what you feel."  Sonia Choquette
I find in my own life that I really don't have much of a problem walking away from something that gives me bad vibes.  My immediate reaction to that type of situation is to run in the opposite direction.  Most times I really can't even explain it, I just know that I need to leave.

What I do find that I have a problem with is immediately walking away from good things.  That might sound odd at first, but I'm sure you can relate. 

How many emails, phone calls and personal invitations do you get to join this group or that activity or help at this event, etc.?  There are so many good things to do out there that a person could go mad. Some of these opportunities are ones that I know my family should do - they are the easy ones to discern.

Other times, like earlier this week, I find myself committing to something that really is a good opportunity for one or all of my children or our whole family, but yet deep down I know I should probably be walking away.  Unfortunately I have a hard time saying no.  

Here's how it usually plays out:  I commit to the activity.  I immediately begin having concerns about how we are going to either afford it or make the time to get to it.  These concerns are temporarily buried as I think of all the positive things that will come out of this activity.  Then I am immediately overwhelmed with anxiety about how this is all going to work out.  

My husband, of course, can very easily tell me to just go back to the person or group, apologize and tell them we can't do it.  I, on the other hand, feel immensely guilty for backing out and feel the need to explain and justify myself until the other person passes out.

Why do I get myself into this position in the first place?  Because I like to do things!  I like for my kids to be involved in things.  I like to be around people.  So my knee jerk reaction is to say yes to everything and then go home and realize that it really isn't feasible.  Oh to be able to hold my tongue and think about it awhile before I commit!  Oh to not feel guilty for saying no to really good things!  Save me Lord from myself :)



  1. Oh, yes, learning to say 'no' in the first place is almost impossible for me!

  2. Oh, yes!

    I've had these moments and in the last 25 years have learned to ask my husband first when I'm not certain. Sometimes I don't immediately see that a thing would conflict with duty, but that's usually what keeps me safe - does it fit with our schedule? Otherwise he has a great perspective on what I cannot figure.

    When we both are wondering, we say our Rosary and look at it the next day.

    Impromptu moments on a blog, though.... Sometimes, Momma needs a breather! :-)

  3. Birgit - I'm glad I'm not alone!

    Mary - What a wonderful way to handle this. It is amazing how clearly our husbands can see things at times.

    God Bless.